Here are a few of my favorite things: Nintendo, Penny Arcade, The Legend of Zelda, Mario, Pokemon, Harvest Moon, Fallout, Dungeons and Dragons, books, dice, Professor Layton, Shadow of the Colossus, Minecraft, and so much more. I'm going to talk a lot about video games, I sincerely hope you don't mind.

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

A Day in the Life of Blooper

I wrote a vignette about my favorite character, Blooper, and I want to share it with you.


The morning dawns bright and sunny. A lone blooper wiggles itself awake. Amongst the slowly waving reeds and seaweed, it blinks tiredly. Near and far, bloopers across the sea are rising to meet the day. Did you know that squid sleep at night? Well, they do.

The blooper stretches out its tentacles, lazily floating and moving back and forth. It brushes against a piece of seaweed; its home and hiding place.

Peace under water is broken suddenly; a determined, mustachioed man swims erratically amongst the cheep cheeps and eep cheeps. The deep cheeps begin to look around, agitated and suspicious.

Blooper settles itself more comfortably against the solid floor of the ocean. The mustache man is of no concern. Deep cheeps are swimming for him, driving him away from the bed of relaxed bloopers, safe and happy amongst their fluid, grassy nests.

A strange sound cuts through the water, and blooper looks warily in its direction. The mustache man is coming back, and the deep cheeps are gone. Bright orange and red balls are whizzing away from the man, striking through the protective cheeps. Even cheep cheeps, and the gentlest eep cheeps, are falling.

With an imperceptible shift, blooper readies itself. The fellow bloopers follow suit. Lying in wait amongst the seaweed, what were once peaceful, undulating homes, become instruments of invisibility.

The swimming mustache draws nearer with slow, easy strokes; a languid attitude dripping along his legs as he glides in the water. Cheeps of all kind lay in still piles amongst the hidden bloopers. The man loops around once, twice, three times, slowing his approach to the seemingly empty and safe expanse of seaweed covered ground.

And then, he swims into the open. Confidently, quickly, his mustache flowing and twisting with the force of the moving water. Blooper braces for a moment, before propelling itself up and into the wavering shape above it; all thought and focus aimed at the man, and the image of the lifeless bodies of the cheeps that litter the once peaceful home of the bloopers.



*banner images: blooper, mario.


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